Just me

I don't know about anyone else but the holidays always bring about reflection. And one of the things I have thought about is one of the areas I have always stuggled in. I was a "Martha" born in a family of "Marys". I will never be the "funny" one, the "pretty" one, the "popular" one, the "musical" one, the "athletic" one or the "outgoing" one. Probably the best I could do was the "smart" one and even that was questionable at times! I am never the first on anyone's list to ask out to dinner or the movies and that is partly my own fault. Through my own experiences and stuggles, I have developed my own set of "rules" for myself and they include not allowing gossip when I am around and never talking to someone about an issue unless they are the person involved or seeking advice only from those in my level of leadership or above. That can make friendships interesting to say the least. There are many times when I walk in a room that conversation stops. And I can understand why people would feel that I am not the most "fun" person to be around. I also made a decision about 4-5 years ago that I would rather be respected than liked. That can be very lonely place to be but I feel like it was something I needed to do and God was calling me to a different place in my relationship with Him and with others. Since words of affirmation is my "love language" - the position that I have placed myself in doesn't necessarily lend itself to be shown love in that way very much. So it was truly a gift to get the following from one of the teens that has come to the church that we attend and the youth camp we run for the conference every summer. Our commitments with young adult ministries haven't always allowed us to have the time to invest in our youth on a weekly basis although we are doing more and more of that lately. All that to say - sometimes you wonder what impact, if any you are having. And when you aren't the "fun" one or the "cool" one - does what you do really matter. So wherever you are - if you have ever stuggled or wondered - the following is for you too. (this is all the more meaningful since this teen now goes to another church and we don't get to see each other that often)

Sandi,
At my church, one of the pastors gave us all a few challenges for the week of Thanksgiving in the last week of our "Macedonian Project" series, and one of them was to thank one person who has influenced you in your walk with God. You should feel blessed just to know that you came to my mind. =) So I just want to say thank you for all that you have done for me in the past. Thanks for all of the times that we had fun together in fellowship. I can remember numerous times when I have had so much fun with you hanging around at your house or at the church with the rest of the girls. Thanks for all of the years of camp that you organized so well. Those late nights were always awesome! Most importantly, thanks for all of the spiritual instruction you have ever given me. Even though there were other people who I got spiritual instruction from more often than from you, it seems like you were always the one to help me out the most. Even though I don't get to see you hardly at all anymore (except random times at Walmart), I will still always remember how you have helped me in my faith and helped me to grow closer to God. Thank you! =) Nicole

**If you haven't taken the chance to say thank you for someone that has impacted your life - I bet they would also think this was the greatest gift they could receive this holiday season!